Its an uncertain world out there

As we watch the news with horror, we hold our little ones a little closer
and become a little more afraid of the world out there.
We teach our children to share, to try to get along,
love and patience is the key and not violence and aggression.
Yet its exactly the opposite that the world portrays out there.
My soul shudders to think of the callous and desensitized world out there.
Where some day our little ones will be alone.
Should we stop watching the news? Should we withdraw from society
that seems to be going to hell in a hand basket?
How will we ever explain these atrocities against humanity to our kids?

I wonder again...

As we grow and time passes...I am forced to wonder and ponder over this one thing. What is morality? What are ethics? What is right and what is wrong? What is natural and what is unnatural?
Yes, these may be questions that plagued many a philosophers and thinkers. It bothers me too. I wonder about these questions as they come into play on a daily bases in my life and of all that I know.
I was told by one person homosexuality was wrong. I asked "Why do you think that?" The answer, though I do not know why it surprised me, was , "Its unnatural. Nature made man and woman for specific reasons and thus to mate in any other equation is against nature."
I was pained by this view. Yes, it is that person's view point. Yet the narrow thinking pained me. How does one grow older and never evolves? I did try to explain to the best of my ability and yet it fell short and the person turned away, clasping tightly to their archaic view point.
So I think who has placed these views in people? How does one come to the conclusion that one act is right and one is wrong? Who gives them the authority to judge an action, a thought a feeling?
If a married woman/man felt an innate need is not being met , they seize an opportunity if it arose, to fulfill it, will they be considered immoral? Most people are conditioned to believe that society functions in absolutes! Yet, is it? Wrong or immoral I mean? Can a person not love one and yet find a need fulfilled somewhere else? I bet the people who are members of Ashley Maddison might back me up on this! Yet thats what got me thinking on this train of thought. Why is it considered cheating or betrayal? Where does it say by nature we are to be monogamous? Yes, it says so in the the holy books of certain religions. But them who wrote those books? Men! Then it is thinking of certain men that decide what we should think is right or wrong not our own sense of judgement.
Here is what I think, we are born once. We have no idea of what came before or what is to come after. We have been given an individual brain for a reason or else we would have been part of a collective like the Borge. We are meant to take decisions pertaining to our lives, individually. Morality, ethics, right, wrong, natural and unnatural are all relative terms and we have to weigh our options based on personal opinion instead of something handed down by a faceless people centuries ago which hold no sense of propriety in today's time and age. It may have been good for the society at their time as it needed the structure and guidlines as it was evolving. Now we are past that and as evolution continues we need to stop with the collective thinking and really apply our own sense to the matter. Society will not disintegrate unlike the popular belief. Now I know some one will argue, then that should we let people do what ever they want like rob, rape and cheat others. NO! That is not what I am saying and if this thought has crossed your mind after reading the above, you should stop reading!
As long as it does not do harm to any other being, its not fatal to anyone, our decisions have to be our own, in matters that pertain only to self and has nothing to do with opion of others is where I am coming from. I am not asking to dessimate society completely.I am saying it is possible to maintain one's inviduality also in a social setting.Matters pertaining to the heart. Marraige, job, friendship, fashion, your own life. Do not be the sheep following the herd!
 We cannot view the world by the standards set by someone centuries ago. We must not judge at all. We have to take it as a part of evolution and learn to grow individually as well as appreciate the growth and changes around us. 

Am I a feminist

So recently I was asked if I had feminist views. That got me thinking...do I? Honestly I never thought in those terms. The fact that whether I am a feminist or not. I do believe in equality, gender equality. I do think we all whether male of female have the right to scio-economic, political equality. But does that make me a feminist?
A famous person (Emma Watson) recently said this quite well and I paraphrase that feminism by definition means gender equality but lately it has become synonymous with man-hating. That just won't do. I definitely know I do not believe in that.
I do think sometimes all the power and attention that has been endorsed to this issue has tipped the balance in a way. Women are striving to attain equality and yet are misguided in thinking it will only be possible by demeaning or degrading the masculine gender. Is that fair? To paint the whole gender in the same color?
I don't think so.
If equality is to be attained then a balance needs to be struck. The women have to rise and the men have to let go of their egos. It is like in any aspect of nature. Yin and Yang. Until there is a balance of genders, harmony does not seem likely.
I do not say this lightly. All my life I have met resistance and have been judged and ridiculed and under estimated just because of my gender. I have struggled with those odds but at the same time kept in sight that it was a male member of the world that actually gave me my wings to fly.
We just have to break the cycle of entitlement is what it is. Men are not born privileged or with the knowledge that they are (mistakenly) the superior gender. It is the parents or society as far as early education goes, who give them the values and thoughts that they are special or different and that blue is for boys and only cars and trucks are to be played with.The retailers propagate this as well.
  This gender defining activities are what sets the two genders apart since childhood and as they grow older the abyss grows and so does the gender definitions. Same goes with the girls of the world. They do not have to wear pink all the time, learn ballet and cook and play with dolls. If  there is a conscious dilution of the rigid roles and definitions, it will by itself  dissolve a huge part of the stark differences.
So the question still remains....am I a feminist?  

Aspire to be great...or don't... its ok !

We all have aspirations. Over the years ...the people I have met...all have something or the other they believe is their goal in life or is their destiny or they aspire to be. Some want to be Spectacular, some mediocre, some women just want a family and some men just want to be free. I have met people who aspire to be great..even if it is just at their work or job while some just want o survive and be able to breath and live to be a 100! 

Don’t you see? Even the most unambitious of us have some ambition or aspiration! 

What i wonder is if we as individuals have a right to judge the other for their decisions or aspirations? The paths they choose to lead to the way they want to go is their choice and their decision. Something they thought was the best road that leads to where they want to go or lead away from where they do not. Can we decide what is right or wrong for someone? As a parent, friend or spouse? Can we completely comprehend the reasoning and the deduction of one individual who has the sum total of their beliefs, experiences , fears and choices. I think not! We all make our decisions, we are entitled to change as our lives progress but no one gets to tell us that this is the right way to be! We be as we need to be at that point of time and then we galvanize when the moment is right. Not a moment before or after! I can choose to be a Hero or Coward! No one can tell me what is moral and what is immoral or ethical or non ethical. There is and that is my opinion entirely...just our choice of what we choose. The standards were set decades  or millenniums ago as guidelines or suggestions of what can be...but in no means can they be the prime directive of the way of life! Each life like a finger print is unique, every person has their own choices by which they get to the point of the fork in the road where they find themselves. The only guide and moral compass must be how they feel? Will that decision be the one they can live with....I don’t say people do not compromise to their circumstances.... some forks in the road lead people to decide that too, and that by no means that they are cowards or not true to their nature or worse! Its their decision to be as they are ... for the while and the rest of their time if they choose as they feel  that is the best course of action...in this case inaction. Its a tough life, each day one makes choices and decisions that effect them. Fear may not be an option but it is very real to most. We are microcosmic in this Universe and if we look at the enormity of the Universe we realize it, but the reality is that most people do not. They are self centred and all they know is themselves, their lives and how and what effects them.... that is all that matter to them. If we look up to the stars we will see that we have 1 life that we know of and thats all we can do... is make this one the best we can! 

So note to self... aspire to be great but don’t kill yourself trying too hard , its ok if you don't want to be that either...its ok not to know what you want and it is definitely ok not to know where you are going from this point on!! 

ethics...

Where does it stop,
I met a few people who believe that its all fair in war
and business.
And I will not sound naive by saying that we should never
be unethical or that nothing unethical should be done ever.
Yet there should be a line.
If by doing something unethical at a miniscule level
you can be happy and not hurt anyone as well as not
tip the balance of things ...it should be okay.

I am always torn between wrong and right and the thing is
I am the person who would follow her heart.
No matter what my mind says. It might tell me
that something is practicle or is socially exceptable yet,
if my heart is not in it....I cant do it.

But then thats just me...what matters is, eithics are still
a very integral part of our lives.
It is the right thing, the humane thing to do.