Don't let me go

I find myself in a place. A place a lot of us might find ourselves.
Its limbo.
If someone glances into the window of my life it seems perfect.
Yes, everything a person can need to exist is available.
What society perceives as achievement is there.
Yet I find myself swimming in a funk.
It's like I am floating right under the surface of reality.
I know I am underwater. I can hear the loud silences.
I can hear my heart beating in my ears. I know I exist.
I know I want to break over the edge of the water.
As I see the light play on the surface I want to reach over and touch its warmth.
Yet, something holds me back.
What is it?
I don't know. My fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of seeing a new reality.
Fear of changing things as is.
So thus I float. For now. The water is like a glass barrier above me,
between me and the world.
Is that reality better than this? I have no idea.
I have a straw to breathe.
The straw that I hold on to with dear life.
Its the only link between me and my chance to reality.
The only link in the chain that keeps reminding me that I should not
forget that I was once different and things CAN be different someday.
Till the day I can break free...oh dear straw of mine...don't let me go.
I might lose sight and lull myself into false security in this limbo.
You are my touchstone.
Don't let me forget.....and don't ever let me go!

Hello Sun....its me...Flower!!

Every morning I got up, I looked up and there he was...
the Sun...shining bright, smiling down at me.
As I saw him come alive, I came alive.
It made me want to burst with colour and fragrance.
I would puff up myself, face it and then smile.
I would give me best smile...every time.

The days the sun was hidden behind clouds...or the nights
when the moon would shine,
I would still remember its warmth and glow and it would make me
wrap myself around me with its memories and still smile.

I began to believe the sun came out only for me.
I presumed that I was the reason it shone so bright.
I assumed that just to see me smile, it put out its warmth and love.

That is ...until I found out ...it was not.
The realization saddened me.
I began to shrivel day by day.
My fragrance began to fade.
And I endeavoured to wrap my self helplessly within myself.
I realized I was not that special to him.
His love was free for all and not for one.
I was ashamed to be presumptuous...
I was embarrassed to puff up and burst with happiness...
I looked around now and saw how I must look.

I died that night....and the last thought in my mind was
maybe I should at least say it out loud what I felt...
So I said... Hello Sun....its me...Flower....I love you....Thank you!!!